"The Office" is one of the most well-known shows and has produced some of the best one-liners of any show. Here is every episode of "The Office" summarized with a one-liner from the episode.




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1. Season 1, Episode 1: "Pilot".

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10 Things You Missed in "The Office" Pilot www.bustle.com

"I guess the atmosphere that I"ve tried to create here is that I"m a friend first and a boss second, and probably an entertainer third." --Michael Scott


2. Season 1, Episode 2: "Diversity Day".

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"Abraham Lincoln once said that "If you"re a racist, I will attack you with the North" and these are the principles I carry with me in the workplace."—Michael Scott


3. Season 1, Episode 3: "Health Care".

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"And uh, well, if this were my career, I"d have to throw myself in front of a train."—Jim Halpert


4. Season 1, Episode 4: "The Alliance".

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Pin by Krissy Johns on The Office | Pinterest | Office tv, Office tv show and The Office

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"I"m trying to write something funny here, what am I going to do with a removed uterus?" —Michael Scott


5. Season 1, Episode 5: "Basketball".

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The Office Basketball Episode. IN YOUR FACE - Create, Discover and Share Awesome GIFs on Gfycat

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"God, this is so sad, this is the smallest amount of power I"ve ever seen go to someone"s head." —Jim Halpert


6. Season 1, Episode 6: "Hot Girl".

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Episode 6 – Hot Girl

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"The purse girl hits everything on my checklist: creamy skin, straight teeth, curly hair, amazing breasts... not for me, for my children." —Dwight Schrute


7. Season 2, Episode 1: "The Dundies".

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“The Dundies” takes the show out of the office, but not The Office out of the show

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8. Season 2, Episode 2: "Sexual Harassment".

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"You wouldn"t arrest the guy who was just passing drugs from one guy to another." —Michael Scott


9. Season 2, Episode 3: "Office Olympics".

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“Office Olympics”/“The Fire”

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"This scented candle...andle...andle, that I found in the men"s bathroom...room...room, represents the eternal burning of competition... or something." —Jim Halpert


10. Season 2, Episode 4: "The Fire".

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Admit it, you just sang it in your mind. "Ryan started the fire." The Office. | The Office | Pinterest | The Office, The office ryan and Office memes

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"Ryan started the fire, it was always burning since the world was turning!" —Dwight Schrute


11. Season 2, Episode 5: "Halloween".

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"I"m guessing Angela is the one in the neighborhood that gives the trick-or-treaters toothbrushes." —Pam Beesly


12. Season 2, Episode 6: "The Fight".

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Episode 12 – The Fight

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"I want people to be afraid of how much they love me." —Michael Scott


13. Season 2, Episode 7: "The Client".

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"Chili"s is the new golf course, it"s where business happens." —Michael Scott


14. Season 2, Episode 8: "Performance Review".

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"Well, last year my performance started with Michael asking me what my hopes and dreams were, and ended with him telling me he could bench press 190 pounds." —Pam Beesly


15. Season 2, Episode 9: "Email Surveillance".

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"I would not miss it for the world, but if something else came up, I would definitely not go." —Michael Scott


16. Season 2, Episode 10: "Christmas Party".

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Official Ranking of" The Office" Christmas Eps

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"Well happy birthday Jesus, sorry your party"s so lame." —Michael Scott


17. Season 2, Episode 11: "Booze Cruise".

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"The word "ship" is hidden in side the word "leadership," as its... derivation." —Michael Scott


18. Season 2, Episode 12: "The Injury".

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"Today I got up, I stepped onto the grill and it clamped down on my foot." —Michael Scott


19. Season 2, Episode 13: "The Secret".

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"I will have a chicken breast, hold the chicken." —Michael Scott


20. Season 2, Episode 14: "The Carpet".

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"I swore to myself if I ever got to walk around the room as manager, people would laugh as they saw me coming, and they"d applaud as I walked away." —Michael Scott


21. Season 2, Episode 15: "Boys and Girls".

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Boys and Girls

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"Why does society force us to use urinals when sitting down is far more comfortable?" —Michael Scott


22. Season 2, Episode 16: "Valentine"s Day".

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The Office GIF - Find & Share on GIPHY Giphy

"You can"t fire me just because Michael isn"t here, Dwight." —Pam Beesly


23. Season 2, Episode 17: "Dwight"s Speech".

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"I can travel anywhere, except Cuba, and I will travel to New Zealand and walk the Lord of the Rings trail to Mordor and I will hike Mount Doom." —Dwight Schrute


24. Season 2, Episode 18: "Take Your Daughter to Work Day".

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186 Days Of The Office - Day 23 (January 23rd) - S2E18: Take Your Daughter To Work Day

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"Jesus could come through that door, he"s not going to help you, if you don"t stop sniffing after my child!" —Stanley Hudson


25. Season 2, Episode 19: "Michael"s Birthday".

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"It is 11:23 exactly, the exact moment, when you emerged from your mother"s vaginal canal." —Dwight Schrute


26. Season 2, Episode 20: "Drug Testing".

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"This year, more people will use cocaine than will read a book to their children." —Michael Scott


27. Season 2, Episode 21: "Conflict Resolution".

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Episode 27 – Conflict Resolution

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"I sat at my desk all day with a rifle that shoots potatoes at sixty pounds per square inch." —Dwight Schrute


28. Season 2, Episode 22: "Casino Night".

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Casino Night (2006)

www.imdb.com

"Thanks, I"ve never owned a refrigerator before." —Creed Bratton


29. Season 3, Episode 1: "Gay Witch Hunt".

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Gay Witch Hunt

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"Jim told me you could buy gay-dar online." –Dwight Schrute


30. Season 3, Episode 2: "The Convention".

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The Convention (2006)

www.imdb.com

"Toby Flenderson is everything that is wrong with the paper industry." –Michael Scott


31. Season 3, Episode 3: "The Coup".

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“The Coup”/“Grief Counseling”

tv.avclub.com

"I know that patience and loyalty are good and virtuous traits but sometimes I just think you need to grow a pair." –Angela Martin


32. Season 3, Episode 4: "Grief Counseling".

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"He"s finished work, he"s on his way home, WHAM, his cappa is detated from his head!" –Michael Scott


33. Season 3, Episode 5: "Initiation".

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“Initiation”/“Diwali”

tv.avclub.com

"Jan used to treat Michael like he was a ten-year-old, but lately, it"s like he"s five." –Pam Beesly


34. Season 3, Episode 6: "Diwali".

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"The Office" episode "Diwali" is still a master class in representation

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"Lot of gods with unpronouncable names, twenty minutes later, you find out that it is essentially a Hindu Halloween." –Michael Scott


35. Season 3, Episode 7: "Branch Closing".

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"The CFO is taking away my house and giving it to Josh and Josh is giving away the garage to Bob Vance." –Michael Scott


36. Season 3, Episode 8: "The Merger".

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michael scott the office gif

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"Dwight might have won the battle, but I will win...the next battle." –Andy Bernard


37. Season 3, Episode 9: "The Convict".

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"The worst thing about prison was the dementors." –Michael Scott


38. Season 3, Episode 10: "A Benihana Christmas".

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"It"s a bold move to photoshop yourself into a picture with your girlfriend and her kids on a ski trip with their real father." –Jim Halpert


39. Season 3 , Episode 11: "Back from Vacation".

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Episode 39 – Back from Vacation

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"The Jamaicans don"t have a word for "impossible."" –Michael Scott


40. Season 3, Episode 12: "Traveling Salesman".

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THE OFFICE 3x13 - Traveling Salesman

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"You know what they say, fool me once, strike one, but fool me twice... strike three." –Michael Scott


41. Season 3, Episode 13: "The Return".

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“The Return”/“Ben Franklin”

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"I am ready to face any challenges that might be foolish enough to face me." –Dwight Schrute


42. Season 3, Episode 14: "Ben Franklin".

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"Mr. Franklin, I would say you are probably one of the sexiest presidents ever." –Michael Scott


43. Season 3, Episode 15: "Phyllis"s Wedding".

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" It"s a big day for Phyllis, but it"s an even bigger day for me, employer of the bride." –Michael Scott


44. Season 3, Episode 16: "Business School".

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“Business School”

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"Whenever I"m about to do something, I think, "Would an idiot do that?" And if they would, I do not do that thing." –Dwight Schrute


45. Season 3, Episode 17: "Cocktails".

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Cocktails

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"Early worm gets the.. worm." –Michael Scott


46. Season 3, Episode 18: "The Negotiation".

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The Office - The Negotiation | Comedy Central

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"So I don"t think that this is totally just a women"s suit, at the very least it"s bisexual." –Michael Scott


47. Season 3, Episode 19: "Safety Training".

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Safety Training

www.themoviedb.org

"Dwight you ignorant slut!" –Michael Scott


48. Season 3, Episode 20: "Product Recall".

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“Safety Training”/“Product Recall”

tv.avclub.com

"Identity theft is not a joke, Jim!" –Dwight Schrute


49. Season 3, Episode 21: "Women"s Appreciation".

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Women"s Appreciation - Wikipedia

en.wikipedia.org

"Sometimes the clothes at GAP Kids are just too flashy so I"m forced to go to the American Girl Store and order clothes for large, colonial dolls." –Angela Martin


50. Season 3, Episode 22: "Beach Games".

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Episode 50 – Beach Games

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"About forty times a year, Michael gets really sick but has no symptoms." –Pam Beesly


51. Season 3, Episode 23: "The Job".

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"Daddy is Meryl Streep." –Michael Scott


52. Season 4, Episode 1: "Fun Run".

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Fun Run (2007)

www.imdb.com

"One day Michael came in, complaining about a speed bump, on the highway... I wonder who he ran over then." —Jim Halpert


53. Season 4, Episode 2: "Dunder Mifflin Infinity"

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Dunder Mifflin Infinity

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"Where are the turtles?" —Michael Scott


54. Season 4, Episode 3: "Launch Party".

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"I did so well last February that Corporate gave me two plaques in lieu of a pay raise." —Dwight Schrute


55. Season 4, Episode 4: "Money".

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www.cheatsheet.com

"I declare bankruptcy!" —Michael Scott


56. Season 4, Episode 5: "Local Ad".

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On the Local Ad episode, what was Stanley"s roll? - The Office Trivia Quiz

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"I find the mystery genre disgusting, I hate being titillated." —Angela Martin


57. Season 4, Episode 6: "Branch Wars".

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The Office - Branch Wars | Comedy Central

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"The eye are the groin of the head." —Dwight Schrute


58. Season 4, Episode 7: "Survivor Man".

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The Office - Survivor Man | Comedy Central

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"It"s better to get hurt by someone you know accidentally then by a stranger on purpose." —Dwight Schrute


59. Season 4, Episode 8: "The Deposition".

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The Office - The Deposition | Comedy Central

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"You expect to get screwed by your company, but you never expect to get screwed by your girlfriend." —Michael Scott


60. Season 4, Episode 9: "Dinner Party".

"Good luck paying me back on your zero dollars a month plus benefits salary, babe!" —Michael Scott


61. Season 4, Episode 10: "The Chair Model".

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The Office - Chair Model | Comedy Central

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"Hello Oscar Meyer Wiener -lover." —Michael Scott


62. Season 4, Episode 11: "Night Out".

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The Office - Night Out | Comedy Central

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" Oh my God, Mom I"ve gotta go one of my friends is getting beat up by some girls!" —Michael Scott


63. Season 4, Episode 12: "Did I Stutter?".

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The Office - Did I Stutter? | Comedy Central

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"It"s just noise coming out of an ugly scientist."—Michael Scott


64. Season 4, Episode 13: "Job Fair".

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The Office - Job Fair | Comedy Central

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"So, I am about to do something very bold in this job that I"ve never done before: Try." —Jim Halpert


65. Season 4, Episode 14: "Goodbye Toby".

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peteneems.

peteneems.com

"The two levels being, welcome to Scranton and I love you." —Michael Scott


66. Season 5, Episode 1: "Weight Loss: Part 1".

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The Office S5 E1 Weight Loss

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"One more bite of eclair each, hold it in your mouth if you can"t swallow it." —Dwight Schrute


67. Season 5, Episode 2: "Weight Loss: Part 2".

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6 great Jim and Pam moments that aren"t "Casino Night" or "Niagara"

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"Pam, will you marry me?" —Jim Halpert


68. Season 5, Episode 3: "Business Ethics".

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The Office S5 E2 Business Ethics

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"When I discovered YouTube, I didn"t work for five days." —Michael Scott


69. Season 5, Episode 4: "Baby Shower".

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The Office - Baby Shower | Comedy Central

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"If a baby were president, there would be no taxes, there would be no war." —Michael Scott


70. Season 5, Episode 5: "Crime Aid".

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The Office - Crime Aid | Comedy Central

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"So much for sex without consequences." —Michael Scott


71. Season 5, Episode 6: "Employee Transfer".

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The Office - Employee Transfer | Comedy Central

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"If I had to put Dwight"s chances into a percentage, I would say he has none percent chance." —Andy Bernard


72. Season 5, Episode 7: "Customer Survey".

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The Office - Customer Survey | Comedy Central

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"Buttlicker, our prices have never been lower!" —Dwight Schrute


73. Season 5, Episode 8: "Business Trip".

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The Office - Business Trip | Comedy Central

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"A concierge is the Winnipeg equivalent of a geisha." —Michael Scott


74. Season 5, Episode 9: "Frame Toby".

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"Since when is it illegal to put caprese salad anywhere?"—Michael Scott


75. Season 5, Episode 10: "The Surplus".

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THE OFFICE: The Surplus

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"Look, I really need this new chair. I mean, seriously, how is it possible that in five years I"ve had two engagement rings, and only one chair?" —Pam Beesly


76. Season 5, Episode 11: "Moroccan Christmas".

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Moroccan Christmas (2008)

www.imdb.com

"What is going to happen when you come into work and you"re dead?" —Michael Scott


77. Season 5, Episode 12: "The Duel".

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The Duel (2009)

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"Rule 17: Don"t turn your back on bears, men you have wronged, or the dominant turkey during mating season."—Dwight Schrute


78. Season 5, Episode 13: "Prince Family Paper".

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Prince Family Paper (2009)

www.imdb.com

"A painting, can be beautiful, but I don"t want to bang a painting." —Kevin Malone


79. Season 5, Episode 14: "Stress Relief: Part 1".

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Stress Relief (2009)

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"You are black, Stanley!" —Michael Scott


80. Season 5, Episode 15: "Stress Relief: Part 2".

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Stress Relief (2009)

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"Stanley, you crush your wife during sex and your heart sucks." —Michael Scott


81. Season 5, Episode 16: "Lecture Circuit: Part 1".

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Lecture Circuit: Part 1 (2009)

www.imdb.com

"Fortunately my feelings regenerate at twice the speed of a normal man"s." —Dwight Schrute


82. Season 5, Episode 17: "Lecture Circuit: Part 2".

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Lecture Circuit: Part 2 (2009)

www.imdb.com

"Jabba the Hut, Pizza the Hut, fat guys like pizza, pepperoni pizza-- pepperoni Tony!" —Michael Scott


83. Season 5, Episode 18: "Blood Drive".

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Blood Drive (2009)

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"Feel a little lopsided becasue of all the blood they took out of my right side." —Dwight Schrute


84. Season 5, Episode 19: "Golden Ticket".

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Golden Ticket (2009)

www.imdb.com

"Put your heart out there like that, it"s liable to just turn into this blackened carbon brick where it has barbecue sauce of shame and rage and two hot people with a perfect relationship would not understand that!" —Andy Bernard


85. Season 5, Episode 20: "New Boss".

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New Boss (2009)

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"Truth be told, I think I thrive under a lack of accountability." —Michael Scott


86. Season 5, Episode 21: "Two Weeks".

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Two Weeks (2009)

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"Any really good headhunter will storm your village at sunset with overwhelming force and cut off your head with a ceremonial knife." —Dwight Schrute


87. Season 5, Episode 22: "Dream Team".

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Dream Team (2009)

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"I mean I"ve always subscribed to the idea that if you really want to impress your boss, you go in there and you do mediocre work, half-heatedly." —Jim Halpert


88. Season 5, Episode 23: "The Michael Scott Paper Company".

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Michael Scott Paper Company (2009)

www.imdb.com

"When I saw you talking to Erin earlier, I noticed that your pupils dilated and your skin flushed and I"m assuming, a little bit of blood rushed into your penis." —Dwight Schrute


89. Season 5, Episode 24: "Heavy Competition".

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Heavy Competition (2009)

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"IT"s like a girl says she"ll make out with you but then her boyfriend is waiting around the corner with a pee-filled balloon." —Michael Scott




See more: Which One Of The Following Is Not One Of The Principles Of Managing Accounts Receivable?

90. Season 5, Episode 25: "Broke".

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Episode 87 – Broke

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"Ever since I"ve gotten clean there"s something about fresh morning air that... just really makes me sick." —Ryan Howard


91. Season 5, Episode 26: "Casual Friday".